What can I do?

I really want to know my "purpose". I read, I listen, I think yeah that sounds right. Then nothing. I am uninspired it seems in general. But I do know I like helping people. I want to be the kind of person people are happy to be around. I do not know if I AM that person but it is the person I want to be.
So my question to myself is what can I do to be more that way and have it be genuine. I am a cynic and a skeptic and I put my own feelings into my perceptions of other people's thoughts WAY to often.
I am really trying to stop making assumptions and judgements.
I am going to read this book the 4 Agreements that some wonderful teachers were talking about this week.
I am going to just try to FEEL. I don't think I do. I was watching the Biggest Loser this week and it really resonated with me. One of the contestants just shut down and was angry and inside of herself. I am sure she also felt selfrighteuous and indignant, or maybe that's just me. But I saw how she just COULDNT let herself feel. Like there shame or some crime or what it seems to me.. it's just POINTLESS.
But Jillian Michaels.. that Goddess of Bitchiness and Wisdom said... Why do you think God gave you tear ducts and emotions if you didn't need to feel and release.
Wow- It was like a frying pan to the head.
I am not sure how to just be ok with emotion but I am going to work on it. I find OTHERS are unsure about emotions and there always needs to be a blame or something Rational to cling to.
So what can I do right now- I will not invalidate my OWN feelings and I will take little steps to be a blessing and more considerate and thinking of others.
I think they two are connected... Connections to people open up your emotions and also leave you open to THEIR expectations and judgements. Scary Stuff.
But I want to know my purpose. I WANT WANT WANT but all these wants are ideals and things that sound good for others. Nothing that grabs hold and lights up my system.
So I will just try to be more a little at a time until I get my revelation or wake up one day standing in the middle of it with no idea how I got there until I look back.